Cones of Shame
Honking at me for crossing the street too slowly.
I’m still thinking about it.
Pasty-faced businessmen that drive jacked-up pickup trucks.
Plus-size tops with pockets on the boobs.
Pete Davidson
Giant armholes
Twist-off tops that need bottle openers
Uneven hoodie strings
Two spaces after a sentence-ending period.
Hopes and prayers
I come now to the sorry conclusion, the terrifying conclusion, the crippling conclusion, that my top grievance is myself.
Oh pickle juice!!!!